Today, let me tell you how not to spend anything and still host a mega party that will get the town talking. 

"I get so many people who come to me and say, look I have no budgets but I would like to host a Page Three party," confesses an event-manager friend who happily takes on all such lost cases.

Now, now, don't look so quizzical. It is an open secret that many of the P3Ps you see every morning are just a bunch of freeloaders in real life. So, here's your own DIY guide:

• How to throw a great party

Cultivate a has-been

Every city, none perhaps more than Delhi, has its bunch of divas-that-were. They may have faded out from short-term public memory and coveted invitee-lists but that doesn't mean they don't have their uses. (Some, of course, successfully reinvent themselves and become brand ambassadors, or jewellery designers, or activists and your kindness in cultivating them will then be repaid in kind.) 

Most are dying to invite all their (former) friends and contacts and rejuvenate their (party-girl) careers. So they will only be too happy to host a do on your behalf. Cajole a has-been into SMSing everyone on her phonebook.

Find a suitable venue

Now that you have found a suitable host for your party, you need to zero in on a venue. Currently, the list of 'hot' venues in Delhi includes Aqua (at the Park, remember the chilled-out fashion week party that Manish Arora hosted there?), Elevate (the club that has made Noida fashionable), Olive (the AD Singh restaurant still remains a favourite), Mayfair (near Qutab Minar, it looks quite stunning in the night), and the Lodhi Garden restaurant (for diplomatic dos) among others.

And apart from the usual five-star venues that are somewhat passe, you can also take your pick from Forum (the flop restaurant has turned into a banqueting space and is apparently enjoying a new lease of life as such), Opera (Yanchi Vadehra's place that, according to the buzz, initially tried to sell itself as a membership-based club but is now trying to be a full-fledged party space-for-rent after failing to find too many members), Veda (Rohit Bal is pushing his restaurant aggressively in the aftermath of it being declared a dud; the designer even turned his birthday bash there recently, naturally just for 'a few friends', into a full-fledged managed event) and Climax (where the short-lived F-Bar used to be). 

• Party with your kids 

Negotiate a deal

For them to give you space plus finger food -- gratis. This is where your persuasive skills will come into play. Armed with your guest list, you will hopefully be able to convince the promoters of at least one of the above that the ensuing publicity will more than make up for the freebies. 

If you fail, you could try knocking on the doors of a business family that happily lets 'friends' host dos at their Prithviraj Road house in the past -- these people have their own catering division to show off, which is an added bonus.

Get the booze sponsored

You'd be surprised at how many liquor companies are willing to come to your aid -- if you agree to have their names on the invite. (Surrogate) advertising budgets take care of such expenses.

• Tips for a great party

Rock the night away... but don't forget to pose

On the other hand, if you have more money than sense and desperately aspire to Page Three, you can turn any shaadi or birthday into an 'event'. Hire an agency to take care of everything, including renting a celeb. 

That's a wide-spread practice these days and the latest to join the bandwagon are these fashion designers who make it very clear that 'pay us our price but we will sit with our families,' or so I am told.

All the best.

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